It is two years since I wrote the entry, "Birthdays and Bridges", which is why I choose to write this blog entry rather than confiding my thoughts to my diary. Ah yes, yesterday was my Birthday, which did not go well. No, it didn't. The best thing that happened on the day were the Toothless videos, so I decided to name the entry after him.
It didn't start out being bad, though. The biggest mood-killer was the fact that, after a period of several months, my Dad had to re-admitted to the hospital, because of this very low platelet counts. Naturally, you can't be happy when you possess the knowledge that your Father is only being kept alive on medicines and he has had to be admitted to the hospital. I can't tell you how helpless it feels, because there is nothing you can do, but just hope and hope and hope that the worst doesn't come to pass. But then what is the point of postponing the worse things farther and farther in time? I don't know, but try: try to be an optimist and feel like an pessimist. It ain't easy! And I like some other experiences, you have to feel this one yourself.
And then? I was unhappy because for a long while no-one wished me. Of course my Birthday wasn't advertised by Facebook, because I didn't want it to be. Does social life exist Facebook? It does, from the most unexpected quarters. Ayona wished me at midnight, Sabine wished me, Arnab remembered during the phone call, Christian wished me later in the day, and then Titir, and finally Xavi. And my Parents, of course.
For a while, I was thinking selfishly, and wondering how come not any other people remembered my Birthday? People who would usually make it a point to wish me? I thought of several answers, but since the question is just an idle one anyway, I will not make it too much of a point to write down my thoughts.
The workday was was like it always is, but the fact that my dad is in the hospital did not make it any exciting. Then there was the German class, which I wish wasn't there. But then again, it was nice that it was there, so that I could get through the day fast. I cooked after I came back, and watched Toothless videos.
I wanted to work afterwards, but the tension took it's toll and lulled me into the dreamworld.
Maybe it would be nice if I spend the day with somebody. Maybe with the Special Someone. But, as of now, my definition of the Special Someone is rather confused. Do you think I am transitioning? From the south to the north? Maybe? I don't know, --- I would probably know if I probed enough, but I don't want to do it now. Things are happy enough, in other aspects, so it doesn't matter. I just don't want to hurt anyone, and don't want to get hurt anymore.
I don't have pictures to add this time, because I didn't take any. Not for my blog anyway.
But, just in case, such that I don't forget or lose track I wanted to refer to two blog/magazine writeups which I found rather interesting, and thus would want to keep a record. This first one is a potrait of how crazy Berlin can be, especially when you try to be normal, and how there is a tendency to become a part of that craziness.
The second one is much more special, and only for a certain section of the society. But it does point a fact, almost point blank, like a slap in the fact: something that I wouldn't really bring up, even though I realize it all the time. There you go: another craziness!
It didn't start out being bad, though. The biggest mood-killer was the fact that, after a period of several months, my Dad had to re-admitted to the hospital, because of this very low platelet counts. Naturally, you can't be happy when you possess the knowledge that your Father is only being kept alive on medicines and he has had to be admitted to the hospital. I can't tell you how helpless it feels, because there is nothing you can do, but just hope and hope and hope that the worst doesn't come to pass. But then what is the point of postponing the worse things farther and farther in time? I don't know, but try: try to be an optimist and feel like an pessimist. It ain't easy! And I like some other experiences, you have to feel this one yourself.
And then? I was unhappy because for a long while no-one wished me. Of course my Birthday wasn't advertised by Facebook, because I didn't want it to be. Does social life exist Facebook? It does, from the most unexpected quarters. Ayona wished me at midnight, Sabine wished me, Arnab remembered during the phone call, Christian wished me later in the day, and then Titir, and finally Xavi. And my Parents, of course.
For a while, I was thinking selfishly, and wondering how come not any other people remembered my Birthday? People who would usually make it a point to wish me? I thought of several answers, but since the question is just an idle one anyway, I will not make it too much of a point to write down my thoughts.
The workday was was like it always is, but the fact that my dad is in the hospital did not make it any exciting. Then there was the German class, which I wish wasn't there. But then again, it was nice that it was there, so that I could get through the day fast. I cooked after I came back, and watched Toothless videos.
I wanted to work afterwards, but the tension took it's toll and lulled me into the dreamworld.
Maybe it would be nice if I spend the day with somebody. Maybe with the Special Someone. But, as of now, my definition of the Special Someone is rather confused. Do you think I am transitioning? From the south to the north? Maybe? I don't know, --- I would probably know if I probed enough, but I don't want to do it now. Things are happy enough, in other aspects, so it doesn't matter. I just don't want to hurt anyone, and don't want to get hurt anymore.
I don't have pictures to add this time, because I didn't take any. Not for my blog anyway.
But, just in case, such that I don't forget or lose track I wanted to refer to two blog/magazine writeups which I found rather interesting, and thus would want to keep a record. This first one is a potrait of how crazy Berlin can be, especially when you try to be normal, and how there is a tendency to become a part of that craziness.
The second one is much more special, and only for a certain section of the society. But it does point a fact, almost point blank, like a slap in the fact: something that I wouldn't really bring up, even though I realize it all the time. There you go: another craziness!
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